I have been listening to country music lately, which gives you a look at my emotional state. I only listen to country when I need comfort. Return to my roots and all that. I went to the orientation for elementary student teacher candidates, and I was blindsided. I couldn’t write about it until now, because I panicked. 1/4 of the women in that group had already secured a position in ESL teaching. I didn’t even know we could look. There were so many things I didn’t know that I just simply freaked out, and did nothing. I fretted and worked and slaved at my current job and worried myself to sleep.

Well, Wednesday I decided to find a position, start there. Everything else would be for naught if I didn’t have a job this Fall. I thought it might be semi-rude to coldcall the principals of the individual schools, that they might want to go through HR channels or something. But I tried to email my resume to the HR department and it bounced back. Fatal error. Address not found. Crap. The online employment app was laborious, and at the end, there were no positions listed so I couldn’t apply for anything. No positions listed on the website. Maybe there aren’t any positions. Then I discovered that the school district had principals’ emails listed on their website. Hao le. So I harvested each of their email addresses and emailed a mass email with my resume to all principals in the school district and prayed. I didn’t include my resume as an attachment because some email programs filter all emails with attachments as spam, and I emailed the thing to myself with all the other principals as BCCs.

Thursday driving home from a class, my phone rang and I didn’t answer it. I was driving. Then I thought, shit. What if it was a school calling me and I didn’t answer it. So Tony advised me to call back and see who it was. It was a comcast rep following up on something from a few weeks ago. Shoot. No job. So then I am at Old Navy trying on a ton of things that didn’t fit, and was getting frustrated. I am fat and unsexy. I am not a stickpixie who can wear all these slim lines. My phone rings, and the woman on the other end says her name and then starts to see when I can meet her next week for an interview. I am not even wearing a shirt. I am sure the other women in the dressing room think I am crazy, setting up an interview in my underwear. I call Mom, and Tony, and Andi, and exult. Someone wants me to work for them!!! With little bitty children!!!

Today, similar situation, but I am at home and have real paper to write the contact info on. I was more prepared to get this thing done…shit. Two interviews.

My work Wednesday may have paid off. I am not counting any chickens yet, but I have a few eggs now, where two days ago I had none. Whew. I have hope now, and if it hadn’t been for Laura I wouldn’t have even thought of this. I can’t wait to go to my interviews…