Have you ever had one of those days where you are kicking yourself from the moment you get up? That seems to be my day today. I am not working this week, so I decided to get my butt to the social security office. Because I applied for a card about two months ago, waited in their office with a variegated crossection of humanity for four hours, and it never showed. So when I called the soc sec hotline about a month ago, asking where my card was, the woman went into a spiel about how my card has probably been stolen, here’s the phone numbers of all the credit bureaus, call them immediately and put a hold on your credit because God knows what this thief is doing with your card, and God bless you honey, good luck.

So shit, right? I put a hold on my credit, spent the better part of a day on hold for all the credit bureaus, called the post office to see if it was held up somewhere, was told that I would get a call back. Every time thropugh the holiday season that someone offered me a store credit card I cringed knowing that maybe someone else was buying a yacht in my name.

So I don’t trust my postman, I don’t trust the soc sec people. My life is over. Will I be able to buy a house? I can’t even get my driver’s license changed. I renewed it in my old name. Hell in a handbasket.

I go today to get my card resent to Mama’s address, anbd the guy looks at my address, says it’s probably because part of the address is on the wrong line. He reads it out to me, and says the wrong city.

The wrong city.

I say wait, I don’t live there.

He says, Well, that’s probably why you didn’t get your card.

I stare at the sheet with all the credit bureau phone numbers on it in different colored markers, the original receipt they gave me in October, at the address which has been wrong. This. whole. time.

So, large nike print on my ass. I’m kicking myself. He says 7-10 days the card should be there. I ask him if I should have it sent to my mother’s address anyway. He looks at me like, “Lady…”

7-10 days from now we’ll see if he’s right.