Be an airport security screener!   This stuff was hard.  I got an OK score, but you should try it.  No wonder the lines take so long.  I thought 2 minutes wasn’t much time, but jeez, now I have a headache…   And this is just gross.  He can’t get his hands on other people’s kids, so he’s decanting more [...]

Like every American, and probably everyone in the world today, I worry that suddenly, my life will be cut short by the acts of others.  Not only by a drunk driver late at night, but also maybe by a faulty elevator at work, a stray bullet in a bad neighborhood, or terrorists.  Or an abusive, controlling boyfriend.    I talk about [...]

Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime unless you’re a conservative radio host. Then it’s an illness and you need our prayers for your recovery. The United States should get out of the United Nations, and our highest national priority is enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq. Government should relax regulation of Big Business and Big Money [...]

Damn http://www.bandnamemaker.com/ for making this so difficult.  You just enter a word, any word, that you like or want to use, and it makes a million trillion names using that word.  Though I am unlikely to use Cadillac of the Goldfish Salsa, it has so many directions and options and branches that I have sppent hours on that site searching and [...]

People think you’re Chinese no matter what part of Asia you are truly from. People think you know their Chinese friend who lives in Baltimore. Your family always cheers for the Asian contestant on TV. You will get carded until you’re 50 years old. Your parents enjoy comparing you to their friends’ kids. Your non-Asian friends ask you how to [...]

A bus full of ugly people crashes, and everyone dies. They then get to meet their maker, and because of the grief they have experienced, He decides to grant them one wish each before they enter Paradise. They’re all lined up, and God asks the first one what the wish is. “I want to be gorgeous,” and so God snaps [...]